Higher
by Cat face
Summary: *reuploaded* A look at Serverus' dark past, i'll change the rating later as it gets into some very touchy themes.
1. Christmas Pudding

Higher   
  
They hadn't even suspected, not once did the thought cross their childish naive minds. They pretended to care, pretended to listen, if only they knew that dirty little secret he was hiding, would they be so kind? He knew their kind, the pitiful that's what they were. They pitied him, comforted him to make them feel like they had accomplished something. He may as well not have existed that's how much he meant to them; just another poor child with no where to go, another lost sheep that's wandered from the flock. But that hadn't mattered, none of that did. In fact now that he thought about it not much had mattered back then.   
  
Severus stared intently into the vile of transparent electric blue liquid. How long had it been? Too long that's for sure, but he didn't need it now it was saved for those who did. He couldn't easily forget a time when he had been in need; the need was so great he wondered now how he had stopped. A violent shudder ran involuntarily down his spine causing his teeth to chatter slightly. The memories of that time were particularly painful.   
  
_'Only one swig and they could be gone.'   
  
But no, how many times had he fallen into that trap? That voice nagging softly at his brain, pushing him beyond his limits. It persuaded him in its heavenly voice, like the call of a siren and he had fallen more times than he could count. Yet he had managed to break its spell, not many he knew of could; it was still there of course, still nagging, still whispering like a ghost in a dream.   
  
__'Watch him, as he floats so heavenly like in his dream, you could forget it all you know.'   
  
And for the longest time he had, how many times had he forgotten? Only to have the reality smack him in the face like icy cold water and needles. Now, however, the need was no greater than a mild craving, and the voice a timid whisper, the trap was set but he was careful. But as the voice said, it was true, he could forget. _

In fact now that he thought about it, he had had a troubled childhood. It hadn't occurred to him then, he was too far-gone to realize that he was only a step away from hells gate. But since then he had realized the reason behind the pity and the lies. You would think he would want to forget, want to remove it all from his mind, but he had fallen to many times and the impact was painful.   
  
But his childhood wasn't the only thing that was troubled; it always came back to him; that sneer, that smirk, those words. They pierced his brain with ever syllable. No wonder he had fallen. But even then he was still a child; it had taken him so long to grow up, another thing that he had realized with time. And children can be so cruel.   
  
Higher   
  
  
Chapter 1: Christmas Pudding   
  
  
He didn't know why he was so popular; people admired him from every angle. It wasn't that he was particularly good looking, he wasn't very nice, he wasn't exactly the top of the class and to make matters worse he had a horrible nagging voice that could make even a banshee cringe. So why was James Potter was so incredibly well liked?   
   
  
Severus couldn't see any part of James Potter that he could possibly like; yet people followed him around like a bad smell. Girls fell over each other to get near him and teachers went out of their way to give him good marks, not that he deserved them. In fact, he wouldn't be much   
surprised if one of them had started a James Potter fan club. Though whoever started this pathetic club was obviously so blinded by that one   
accomplishment that James Potter had been riding from first year; the youngest chaser in Hogwarts history. Well whoop-de-do for Potter.   
  
  
It was sad; he could have wept for them if he didn't feel so much rage towards them. It wasn't that he was jealous of James Potter, at least that was what he kept telling himself, he was just sick. Every time he saw them, their stupid faces shining with admiration for their self acclaimed king he felt he was going to be violently ill. He wouldn't have traded places with Potter for every Galleon, Sickle and Knut in Gringotts.   
  
  
But that wasn't the only reason he resented James Potter with every inch of his being. No, it was a lot more personal than that.   
  
"Morning Snake ready for that big, important potions exam?"   
  
  
Severus shuddered. Not a moment's peace, not a single tick of the clock when that voice wouldn't haunt him; course through his brain like   
electricity leaving him burning, steaming at the ears with rage. Potter knew, how he had found out was well beyond Severus' knowledge, but he   
knew and he was intent on using it to slowly and very carefully torture him.   
  
  
He didn't turn around, but apparently he didn't need to. Potters voice, together with the image of his face, contorted with that sick pleased smirk; those thick tasteless glasses magnifying the relentless malice and twisted humour that glinted in his docile brown eyes. Combined, they were enough to drive Serverus to the brink and push him roughly over.   
  
  
"You want to hope she's not there Snake, wouldn't want to fail."   
  
His mind fell blank, she did that to him; she disarmed him and left him open and vulnerable. And Potter knew, Potter knew everything; knew his   
secret, knew his weakness and it was everything Severus could do to keep Potter quiet. There was only one solitary barrier preventing Potter from spilling his secret. It was, unfortunately, the same thing that was held in. It was like water holding up a dam; it would eventually fall, everything rushing out in a torrent of water and drown everything in its path.  
  
Her, Potter didn't even need to say her name to make the thoughts fly out of Severus head. Lily Evans, she was the cause of this endless   
torture, she was the reason he failed classes, she was a siren and he was under her spell. She was so angelic, so talented, so perfectly _His. And the only thing keeping Potter quiet, the only reason the damn had yet to crash was because he was scared. It was stupid, but then again so was Potter. He was scared if she found out; she might change her outlook on everything. Might decide the sun didn't shine out of Potters ass and might just see how worthy he, Severus, was.   
  
Of course the whole story was a load of dragon dung, despite the blinded, infatuated way in which Severus viewed Lily, the kind of way that shut out all her faults, what little she had, and made her seem just so perfect in just the right way. She was so far gone with Potter not even the very strongest memory charm cast by the very strongest wizard; could make her forget just how very in love with Potter she was.   
  
Laughter filled the hall; Potter had won. It was true, he wasn't ready; in fact as long as she was here he would never be ready, and Potter knew that. Potter relished the fact and strived to keep it as alive in Severus head as it was in his. Severus scowled at his half-eaten porridge suddenly feeling every inch of hunger disappear to be filled with a sick burning rage. If only they knew how rotten Potter really was will they still be willing to lick his shoes?   
  
He stabbed his spoon into the remaining porridge and started stirring it roughly. If only Potter and his Marauders were in there what fun life would be. To hear their feeble little screams for mercy, that they hadn't meant a word they had said and that he was so superior and was so very deserving of Lily. Of course fantasy was always a world more preferred.   
  
He glared at the porridge bowl, his face flushing not only with rage. He stabbed a little porridge covered Sirius Black deeper into the thick white sludge, yes the Marauders all had to go, not just James.    
  
He tried his best to shake the thought form his head, it was true he wanted so bad to get rid of them, but he had other things, life, to think about. They'd pay their due; even if he had to sell his soul to the devil himself he would get revenge on James Potter and his Marauders. As the saying went, revenge is a dish best served cold. But no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that, it always seemed so far away. _

Every where he went he would hear their fan club talking about how great each and every one of them would be. And though he tried not to listen to the children's' buzz it was like a great rush of water slowly wearing him down.   
  
Severus stood up ever so slowly from his seat, careful not to raise his eyes. He was too humiliated, like every other morning, to look anyone in the eyes, especially Potter. He had got this down to an art by now, how many times had he had to keep his eyes downcast in fear he would start blushing furiously? But it didn't matter, they would pay, it was people like that that made Severus so very sick.   
  
He gathered his books that were sitting on a nearby chair, pretending to be studying his shoes as if they were the most fascinating thing in the world. He edged his way around the Slytherin table, easily dancing out of the way every time someone 'accidentally' pushed their chair out. Yes he had got this down to an art; there was only one thing he hadn't prepared for.   
  
"Ooof" They collided. She had been so soft and so warm in that brief moment of contact, but now that it was over it hadn't been worth was he   
received.  
  
"Oh gosh I'm sorry Severus." He glanced up, her words were kind, her face so soft unlike Potters. Her eyes were so forgiving; not glinting with malice and hate and everything that Potters' were. How she could possibly see anything in Potter when she was so much better, so much more deserving, was a mystery.   
  
"Better watch where you're going Snake!" He knew it was coming, he could see it from a mile away, could smell it on the breeze. Couldn't resist could he? Not for one moment, not even the most prized moment in Severus' life, he just couldn't keep his mouth shut, because that's what Potters do best.   
  
"Don't listen to him." She whispered as she glided past him, and he couldn't stop his eyes from following her. Her movement was so graceful, her hair so sleek and beautiful, like molten lava that had been spun into silk. But as she moved closer to the Gryffindor table _He came into view. _

It was pointless to pine, she would never be his; to her he was just another poor lowly soul that's teased by her semi-boyfriend. What did he matter in the grand scheme of things? He was just another walking kick me sign, another practical joke waiting to be pulled. And he had no right what so ever to feel so infatuated with her. Potter was really getting to him?   
  
Conjuring up every last ounce of dignity that had survived that encounter he lowered his head and walked, defeated, out of the Great Hall towards the dungeon where his fate would be boiled in a cauldron.   
  
**   
  
He, as Potter had said, didn't pass the potions exam. In fact everything that Potter had predicted was exactly as it was. The whole lesson he was watching her, it was like she had turned on some magnet and his eyes just refused to look anywhere else. Her eye brows furrowed so slightly giving her that look of concentration; her delicate pearly white hands gripped the glass vials. He blushed again for the umpteenth   
time that hour, he knew why she did this, he knew perfectly well. Potter told her to, he would imagine it now…   
  
"Okay Lily I want you to look as cute and innocent as possible, he'll definitely fall for it. Stupid as the day is long isn't he? He'll never get you."  
  
"Oh James your so smart and handsome and…"   
  
"Severus," Severus' head snapped up at the sound of the potions masters voice, "Severus, Severus, Severus, what are we going to do with you?"  
  
Professor Tink was shaking his balding head slightly, his beady mousy eyes; his whole face looking down on him in pity. That's right she had landed him here, the dank, dark, musty smelling office of the school potions master. Tink had obviously gotten fed up with his lack of interest in the exam and this was the fourth time his cauldron had bubbled over spilling sticky, over cooked muck all over the dungeon floor.   
  
"You could be great Severus," Tink continued taking a seat opposite him still shaking his head, "I know you have it in you, you're not stupid Severus if you would only apply yourself you could be top of the class."   
  
Severus didn't speak, it wasn't that he wanted to fail, far from it; he just didn't have a choice. If she was removed from the class then he might just stand a chance, but it didn't seem like that would be happening too soon. He was doomed to fail potions and there was nothing he, nor Tink, could do to stop it.   
  
"I know you could pass this class Severus, and don't think I'm forcing you to do anything you don't want to, but may I suggest private tutoring? I could arrange a time and date for tutoring sessions after the Christmas break, if you're willing that is. So what do you say? I for one don't want to see you fail a class you could me getting top marks for."  
  
Tinks' small beady eyes studied him from under his thick bushy eyebrows, but the question had fallen on deaf ears. How could he have forgotten? If he had only listened to the buzz in the school instead of turning a stubborn deaf ear he could have been properly prepared, he could have, then, avoided it hitting him so suddenly like this. Christmas holidays, the most loathed time of the year, of course apart from summer holidays. His home wasn't the haven from the ever-scrutinizing eyes of his teachers and peers like it was to so many others. It wasn't an escape from work like it should be; it was literally a hell on earth.   
  
"I'll let you think about it then. Go on the feast is about to start, it want you to get back to me as soon as you've made up your mind, have a good holidays then."  
  
Tinks' voice was a barely audible echo in the back of Severus' head, but that last sentence stabbed at him like a very blunt kitchen knife. It was almost like Tink could read his thoughts and was punishing him just like Potter would. Tink stood up from his seat, his eyes and face still sympathetic, but it now seemed like more of a sarcastic sympathy.   
  
Severus mechanically followed suit, his limbs moving without thought or command. He blindly walked through the deserted dungeon, he had lost   
Tink a while back but it hardly mattered. He wasn't going to the feast as Tink had suggested, he felt right now that he could never feel hungry again. So instead he expertly made his way down the twisting turning paths that lead towards the Slytherin common room.   
  
He slumped down on the nearest chair; his insides doing a funny flip flop inside of him. His mind had gone blank; he didn't know what to think. How many times had he asked to stay here for the Christmas break? Only he didn't have a good enough excuse, if only they knew the truth they'd be begging for him to stay. 

It was his fault though, he and his stupid pride. But He had a good reason for not telling them; they'd put him in an orphanage for sure. He'd heard about orphanages, seen them in movies, there was no way he was going to one of those, he'd rather go home. And that brought him all the way back to the beginning.   
  
He sighed heavily wishing now he'd heeded Professor Tinks advice and attended the feast. It would have been the last decent meal he would have eaten until the holidays finished. It was too late now thought; they'd be almost finished. So instead he settled for sleeping. It would be the last good nights' sleep he got for a while.   
  


**

  
The morning came too fast, like someone had yanked the sun up out of hiding four hours early. It wasn't that he was tired, in fact   
the moment he realized he was awake all the dreadful memories came flooding back and made him more awake than if someone had thrown icy cold water all over his face. 

During breakfast he tried to forget everything while the other children babbled incessantly about visiting their parents and what they were getting for Christmas. And as usual Potter was shooting weird glances at him from the Gryffindor table, it was the only time in Serverus' life he was glad Potter was such an ass. But even he failed to rid Severus' mind of the dread that engulfed him; hell even Lily had lost   
her appeal.  
  
The train ride, too, went unnaturally fast, like two or three extra engines had been added bringing him faster then even towards his doom. Before he knew it he was sitting in the loud smelly bus that would complete his trip to hell. He tried everything he could to forget what lay ahead. Tried thinking of Potter, of Lily, he even contended himself in watching a fly strut around on the face of the sleeping man behind him. But no matter what, no matter how hard he concentrated, he couldn't forget.   
  
With a horrible contraction of his heart, like someone had filed it with ice and squeezed it very hard, cold dread spread through his veins to every limb. He was home; if he could call this pathetic shack a house. He didn't have a home; they said home is where the heart is. But unfortunately for him his heart was buried six feet under, what that did that say about his fate?  
  
The bus shuddered to a halt and with a deep shaky breath Severus climbed to his feet and dragged his trunk, which at the moment felt it weighed about as much as his stomach, off the bus. Of course there was no use denying it, he was here and there was no where else to go. He'd just have to wait it out until the holidays were finished. 

It wasn't even that bad here, really, he liked being alone, and humans can last a long time without food. But that wasn't what bothered him; the hunger and the loneliness were just soft whispers at the very back of his head. The things he dreaded the most were the memories.   
  
He glanced around the horrible beaten shack, every where he looked he would see her face, every item a remembrance of her, her voice, her hair. His mother was a brave woman, no body he knew could have gone through what she had and kept sane. Some of the things she told him, the stories would send shivers down his spine, even now.

He could still here her voice in his head, not beautiful like most women's' voices, but strained and raspy, like she'd just been screaming for hours on end. But that didn't matter, it wasn't the voice that told the story, it was the manner in which the story was told.  
  
Severus had never met his father, something he was very glad about. Not even his mother, from his knowledge, knew who his father was. He   
remembered her telling him, when she was younger, maybe fifteen or sixteen, a time when Voldemort was gaining power and neither Wizard nor   
Muggle was safe. A Death Eater, a desperate follower of Voldemort, had raped her. At the time Muggle murders and rapes were common, a countless number of girls had fallen victim, his mother was just another percentage.   
  
But she had been the unlucky percentage, instead of dying or being killed afterwards, she fell pregnant. Nine months later she gave birth to him, a living replica of the man that had taken everything away from her. But still she cared for him, raised him; took to jobs to feed him and send him to school. She was a battler; they had less then nothing, old tattered clothing and barely any food. 

She could have thrown him out, could have given him to an orphanage, but she didn't. And as he grew he knew she found it hard to look at him. She would always say, when she was really mad, how much he looked like his father. She didn't know how far it cut him, to know he looked like the same person that had caused her so much pain.   
  
"Oh but it's not your fault," She would say, "You can't help that."   
  
But despite all these words, every way in which she proved she didn't blame him and loved him, the letter from Hogwarts pusher her over the edge. 

She knew his father had been a wizard and had stubbornly turned a blind eye to the obvious signs he was showing. That of course didn't stop him   
from studying; he wanted to know everything he could about his gift. He found books in old Muggle book stores about magic, he wasn't sure if it   
was the real thing but it didn't matter. His mother was furious; she wanted to believe he was normal, never wanted to him to be like his father.  
  
However when her worst fear was dropped in her lap by a handsome tawny owl, it was hard to ignore. She had refused, which had to be expected,   
she wrote them a letter back saying that her son would never be one of them. But no matter how hard she tried she couldn't ignore what was so   
plainly in front of her. He had persuaded her, threatened to run out on her in order for her to accept. His stupid words still haunt him to this day.   
  
"Mum you cant deny it, you know what I am, you've known for ages, there's no use fighting it, I might as well learn how to use this power then I can rid the world of people like _him."   
  
She hadn't argued after that and he had felt so guilty. The look in her eyes had almost made him retract everything he had said. But she agreed, quietly, without another word she agreed. And that had been the very worst day, in a long series of bad days for Serverus.   
  
Severus heaved a long sigh heavy with the burdens his memories brought him. It was like this every year without fail. He had been in the house   
five minuets and already his brain was being bombarded with memories and there was nothing he could do to stop them. It was like stepping into a flash back to his childhood, back to the days when life was easy and full of love and happiness, back to the days when she was there.   
  
Severus' body shivered slightly as more painful memories forced their way into his brain. _

_'Remember why you're alone? Remember why you're hungry and miserable? It's all your fault, all his fault she died.' _

No, there was no one he could place the blame on but himself. He had to live with the reality of what he had done; not a soul to comfort him, to lead him into a false reality by telling him it wasn't his fault because it was. He killed his mother. 

  
Heaving another great sigh Severus climbed to his feet. No use trying to hide it, she was gone and nothing could bring her back. Gathering up   
every last inch of resolve he had, he left the old mouldy kitchen table he had, at some point, seated himself at and walked to the broken screen door that lead straight to her.  
  
He remembered it like it was yesterday, his very first year at Hogwarts when Christmas holidays had come around. He had been so excited, just   
bursting with stories to tell her. That day the train and bus rides had taken so long as if they were trying to prevent him from getting home. He wished now they'd succeeded. He had burst through the front door, a huge stupid grin plastered on his face to find her lying there, cold and motionless on the kitchen floor.   
  
He remembered, being the naive child he had been back then, he had tried to wake her up, tried to convince himself she was merely sleeping. He was the only person capable of leading himself into that false reality; there was no one else, then, to do it for him. But he was being foolish; she had been dead for weeks, maybe months for all he knew.   
  
A cold shiver ran down Severus' spine when he reached her grave. It was a crooked mouldy wooden cross he had made out of an old floor board,   
splattered with blood from where he'd cut himself in his clumsiness. Across the horizontal plank of wood, in messy blotchy writing, the word 'mother' had been written with black ink. He hadn't stopped crying that whole week; and he didn't remember eating or sleeping.   
  
He was actually quite surprised he had managed to bury her and make the cross, he had been grief stricken as any child would have been. Of   
course he didn't cry anymore, he couldn't, every tear had already been spent. Now that he thought about it, he had taken it pretty well. He vowed that he'd go on and become a great sorcerer; that he'd never ever be like his father. He'd come up with a million excuses why he was alone, and he'd gone back to school.   
  
He gave a short hollow snort of laughter; he had been so bull headed back then, didn't care about anything. He hadn't even realized she had died because he wasn't there. If he hadn't been so selfish maybe she'd still be here and he wouldn't be lying for his life. 

That was another thing that still baffled him, no one had found out. He'd been going to school for the last five or so years with second hand books and stolen robes. Yet either everyone was too stupid to notice or they turned a blind eye to it. Didn't anyone find it strange that since that middle of first year he had never once gotten any mail? And it was a known fact that the school had sent several owls home about him. But then again, not very people noticed those kinds of things about him.   
  
But even the teachers, as mentioned before several owls had seen sent here about his behaviour, didn't the school find it absurd that every time the owl would return with its letter still in tow? Surely his lame excuse 

"My mother's an actress she's on a travelling show right now, but she'll be back soon," surely they couldn't believe shed been on a travelling show for five years. That is, of course, unless they were turning a blind eye to it.   
  
Severus absently patted the soft ground beneath his feet a few times before standing and retreating back up to the dilapidated shack. He glanced around the inside of his 'house,' it was in a terrible state of disrepair. 

Many of the floorboards were rotten and broken; the mouldy wooden table had a broken leg and was being propped up on top of a three legged stool. The cupboards in the kitchen were either missing doors or their doors were barely hanging on one hinge, and where the kitchen sink should be there was a large gaping hole. It was in a very sad state; Severus wondered again just how he'd survived this long.   
  
During the summer holidays he took part time jobs either Muggle or not, it didn't matter, as long as it got him money. He would sometimes go weeks without food until he was so weak with hunger it was impossible to go on. He did anything possible to raise enough money to buy school supplies; sometimes some sacrifices just had to be made. But still even he was surprised at his endurance. 

He bet Potter had never worked for anything in his life; it was people like Potter that made him sick to the stomach. He had everything handed to him on a silver platter, had the best life anyone could ask for. Yet he still managed to be bitter and resentful, like he was rebelling against his perfect life.   
  
"That's right Potter," Severus started out loud, "Lap it up, 'aint getting any better than you get it."   
  
He was just about to open his mouth to speak again when, with a loud bang that shook the whole house and made one of the cupboard doors fall   
off its hinges, the door burst open and in its wake stood a furious Professor Tink. His small beady eyes glinted in the fading afternoon sun and his tiny nostrils flared. He looked just about ready to commit bloody murder, but when he spoke his voice was strangely calm.   
  
"Come with me boy."   
  
**  
  
AN: gripping? There's more to come remember, I'm writing up chapter two as you're read this. Well maybe not, but I'm working on it a lot of the   
time. Hope you enjoyed


	2. Full Moon

Chapter Two: Full Moon

Severus swallowed painfully, his throat was so clogged with worry it felt like he had swallowed a snitch. They knew, they knew and they brought him back. The lies, the hunger, it had all been so pointless. What were they going to do, what would Dumbledor do? They couldn't possibly send him to an orphanage, could they? They had the power to, but they wouldn't, they couldn't, how could they?

Severus wrung the frayed hem of his robe tightly in his hands; so tightly, in fact, it hurt. Not as much, though, as his chest which seemed to be getting smaller and smaller by the second. He glanced unseeingly around the room trying, in vain, to find some small shred of hope in the whirring silver objects and old headmasters and mistresses. But nothing he could see could possibly help him now. 

If Severus hadn't been so preoccupied with his dread and the miserable outcome of the interview which would decide his fate for the rest of his adolescent life, he might have been quite interested in the vast amount of funny objects and little puffs of coloured smoke. Most peculiarly, the ugly withered bird in the corner which was staring blearily at him and squawking helplessly. He was usually quite interested in anything of the like, but his impending doom easily outweighed his curiosity.

Suddenly, like an icy cold hand had just grabbed his stomach and twisted it roughly, the door creaked open and Dumbledor appeared accompanied by Professor Tink. It was as if someone had stuck a vacuum cleaner in his ear and sucked all the thoughts out of his head because the only thing that he as left with was dread, icy cold dread. He didn't quite know what to expect, he had never been in such serious trouble before and he didn't know weather Dumbledor was liable to explode or not. 

The thing that troubled Severus the most, however, was not the fact that he was getting in trouble for not telling them about his mother, but Dumbledors' face. It didn't look the slightest bit mad, but in that sense it didn't look particularly happy either. It was like a mask and Severus couldn't decipher it. Next to Dumbledor Tink was fuming, that gave him a small bit of comfort knowing exactly to expect from him, but with Dumbledor it was like stepping into a pitch black room. 

Severus watched the headmaster carefully as he took a seat opposite him, all the while his face unreadable. He took his time to peer at Severus though his half moon spectacles which glinted mysteriously in the candle light. Why couldn't he just start lecturing, shouting, dancing, why couldn't he just do something? His eyes were burning into him and it was extremely uncomfortable. 

The tension was so thick in the air Severus felt like he was underwater, and it was quite obvious Tink felt the same way as he kept throwing Dumbledor exasperated looks and shifting his weight from one foot to the other. But Dumbledor didn't seem to mind; in fact he seemed to be enjoying it because at that time his lips curved under his silver white beard into a smile.

"Mr. Snape," Dumbledor started heaving a great and impressive sigh.

If Severus had though when Dumbledor started talking that the tension would lift, he had been sadly mistaken. The old wizard was now surveying him closely with his twinkling eyes making Severus feel like an expensive broom that people gawked at through shop windows; and no matter how much he shifted or picked at the hold in his jeans, Dumbledor wouldn't stop.

"Mr. Snape," Dumbledor repeated and Severus was severely tempted to say 'Professor Dumbledor,' but he was smart enough to hold his tongue, "I have had several inquiries about you Mr. Snape, can't seem to find hide nor hair of your guardian Severus. You wouldn't happen to know where your mother has gotten to would you?"

Severus had to bite his tongue very hard to prevent all the sarcastic comments lurking on the tip of his tongue from spilling out. It hardly seemed appropriate for him to start being cheeky to the headmaster but he was setting himself up and it was everything Severus could do to keep his mouth shut.

"We have sent several owls addressed to her and everyone has returned unsuccessful."

"Maybe you should take your owls to the vet?" Severus muttered quickly, biting his tongue again. He couldn't help himself. Despite all the dread that sat like a brick in his stomach he couldn't hold his tongue still. 

"Maybe we should," Dumbledor agreed still not breaking eye contact, "But this has been the first time any of those owls have failed us. It seems the problem lies deeper than the owls."

"My mum is out of town, she's an actress and she's doing a travelling show, but she'll be back." He knew that had sounded rehearsed, it was always the same reply but he had his reasons for lying, yet somehow he feared it wasn't going to work this one time.

"Oh really?" Dumbledor sat up slightly, his eyes, though never leaving Severus' widened slightly, "Well then I agree with you Mr. Snape, it seems we do need to take our owls to the vet because, until now they haven't failed on a delivery, no matter weather the deliveree was travelling or not."

It was pointless to deny it anymore, the old man was right. Owls weren't stupid enough to be fooled by someone moving of travelling, he had once heard about an owl that delivered a message to Australia. In fact this whole conversation was pointless, He knew Dumbledor knew so why did the Headmaster take so much pleasure in playing with him? Right now, Severus noticed, his eyes were twinkling brighter than ever. 

Was he trying to lead him into a false sense of security? Should he just blurt it out, confess? If they already knew what was the point of keeping up the façade? Maybe, was it because he himself didn't want to admit it? Didn't want to finally admit he was alone?

"Severus we need to know the truth," Dumbledor started up again in a softer and more careful voice than before, but for all Severus was listening he could have been talking to a tree. The truth was harsh and painful, no wonder he avoided it so; he never knew just how painful it could be. He had based everything he did, his whole life on that one lie, that one pitiful belief; someone cared. 

How could he have let himself get so carried away? He should have known now, once he stopped lying, his whole world would come crashing down around him. She was gone, she was gone and she was never coming back. He knew that in his head, but for the past five years his heart had refused to believe it. Why, now, did it finally have to realise that he was alone? Now when there was nothing?

The hideous wrinkled half dead bird in the corner suddenly gave a loud moan and burst into flames causing Severus to be ripped from his shocked mind and back to suddenly real reality.

"She's dead!" He screamed his eyes wide and locked on the ball of flame that was, seconds before the half plucked bird, "She's dead and she's not coming back!"

With a great effort he ripped his eyes off the smouldering bird and locked them on Dumbledor who looked slightly shocked but generally calm and under control. Severus couldn't stand the sight of him and his calm façade; now was not a time to be calm. The sky was falling down on them.

He shifted his gaze hopefully to Professor Tink, who stood nervously behind Dumbledor, his own eyes flicking from the bird to Severus. It was his fault, if Tink hadn't come and brought him back to this relentless reality perhaps the walls would still be standing. 

"Mr. Snape," Dumbledor started but was cut off immediately by Severus' frantic screaming.

"Don't you get it!? She's gone! How can you be so calm? She's dead! She's dead and now- now…" He couldn't bring himself to finish, the reality was too painful. Orphanage, he shuddered just at the thought and now he was doomed to spend the rest of his adolescence there, wasting away like some animal in a cage. 

Now was definitely a time to panic, yet there was nothing he could do. Usually if there was an obstacle such as this he would always find a way out, but his brain had frozen and the only thing he could think about was his doomed fate and her mocking smiling face. If she hadn't died he wouldn't be in this situation.

"Severus," Dumbledor started again and Severus raised his eyes, which were on the brink of tears. He was unable to do anything else or find any words to express the emotions that were engulfing him. "Severus how long has she been dead?"

"Since half way through first year." Severus croaked mechanically

"Why didn't you tell me, or any of the staff?"

"You- you…" Severus trailed off feeling his stomach turn icy cold, but Dumbledor urged him to continue, "You'd put me in an orphanage."

"That would have been our first line of action, but not against your will, do you have any family, Aunts or Uncles; you could have stayed with?"

"You think I didn't think of that? Severus snapped, "They were all killed by _him." _

Dumbledor didn't pursue the subject; instead he did something, the last thing Severus suspected.

"It is not against school regulation for a student to board full time at the castle. There have been quite a few students who chose to stay for the summer holidays, for personal reason of course."

Severus' heart jumped merrily around his chest and every trace of that numbing cold worry or fear that had been present in his crumbling world was now gone. The walls were still standing and one glace out the window at the starry night sky told him it too was still in its rightful place. And, where there once sat the charred remains of Dumbledors bird, there now lay a very small and ugly chick. 

Maybe reality wasn't as bad as he had first thought, but how did he if this reality was really real? It all could just be some elaborate dream; He pinched himself hard on the back of his hand, digging his nails painfully into his skin. It hurt but he was still in the extravagantly furnished room, with the ugly bird and his two new favourite professors. It was reality, and it couldn't have gotten any better.

"Of course there is a lot to arrange, we will have to speak with the ministry about your situation but I would say your chances are rather good. You are free to stay for the remainder of these holidays."

"C-can you please not tell anyone about- about my mum?"

"You have my word; now go on, supper should be served shortly." Dumbledor winked and smiled softly from under his silver beard. Severus couldn't even grasp any means of showing his gratitude towards Dumbledor. Thank you just didn't seem satisfactory and there was the fact his brain was still reeling with his new found reality. He gave a weak smile, but for the first time in what seemed like eternity, his smile wasn't forced.  

**

It wasn't usual for Severus to have free run of the castle, in fact this new found freedom was so alien to him it took more than few days to get used to it. He spent the first days until Christmas in the library reading, but then the thought occurred to him, he didn't have to stay in the library; he had the castle practically to himself. In the days preceding Christmas he took to reading in the courtyard or in the snow by the lake or any other place that seemed appropriate.

He found he had very little complaints these days. He shared the Slytherin common room with one pale first year student and a black haired girl he had never noticed before. But he never spent much time there preferring to sit in the sun and read. The only real complaint he had was the fact that he had to share the castle with James Potter and his marauders. But he, for some reason, never saw them during the day and even at dinner where they were all seated around the same table they didn't seem to have much to say to him. He found this particularly disturbing, but didn't worry too much about it. 

The days after Christmas that year had been some of the best he had known, and also the worst, not the very worst because he had of course seen worst, but some of the worst. It was only two days after Christmas when he stumbled across it, and he wished to the very day his heart would stop beating he could never have found it.

He was returning, a little later than was allowed, from the library when he heard footsteps coming from the corridor ahead of him. Suspecting the caretaker was prowling the grounds for signs of students out of bounds at night time he ducked into the nearest classroom and waited patiently for the footsteps to die away into the otherwise silent castle. But instead of just the halting footsteps of the caretaker he heard several footsteps approaching accompanied by very familiar voices; voices which, like him, were not allowed out after hours. He heard distinctly over the others, James Potter, but that wasn't all that intrigued him, it was what that particular voice was saying.

"Come on hurry up, you're making too much noise you want to wake up the whole castle?"

"I cant help it, this stupid thing keeps getting caught on my shoes, why do we have to wear it anyway? It's pitch black." 

That was the voice of that little kid that followed them around, what was his name, Peter. What were they up to? A sudden idea struck Severus; they weren't supposed to be doing anything right now, anything except sleeping. They could get into a lot of trouble for doing things they weren't supposed to be doing at this time of night. He could just go to Dumbledor, but then he would have to dob himself in…

"Wait, he's coming..." The footsteps stopped right outside the classroom he was hidden in, would they come in here for the same reason he was, he should hide. 

"Quickly in here." 

Severus quickly ducked behind one of the desks in the back of the classroom, it was dark, they wouldn't be able to see him but he didn't know how long he would be able to crouch here, his feet were already starting to sting and he had only been crouching for a second. 

All of his worries flew out of his head as the door to the classroom creaked open and shuffling feet filled the otherwise silent room. The door closed with a click and only moments after he heard another set of footsteps approaching. They stopped momentarily outside of the classroom he and the marauders were hidden but then set off again and faded into the castel halls.

"That's why were wearing this thing Peter, we could have been caught."

"Oh shut up, who was it anyway?"

"Who else? Reckon he was out to bust us?"

"How the hell would he know that were not safe asleep in out beds?"

"Well remember last time? I reckon he's got us bugged or something." 

"Oh stop talking crap Sirius why would he put bugs on us?"

"Never mind lets just get out of here, were losing precious minuets."

"Fine let's go." 

And they were gone, but to where? Surely they couldn't be going back to bed. They were plotting something as marauders usually did and Serverus was ready to bet everything he own, which was a significantly little amount, that they were up to no good. He was severely tempted to go to Dumbledor but the thought of dobbing himself in stopped him, maybe if he followed them he could find out where they was going. 

That was when another thought struck him so suddenly he toppled over. He lay sprawled on his back in the dark empty classroom a realisation so complete in his brain he was surprised he had missed it at all. Lupin, it was all Lupin. 

He had seen him earlier that day, just before diner with the matron, Madam Pompfrey and they were going down to the Whomping Willow that had been planted in his second year. He had been curious at the time but the thought had been pushed out of his head since then. Why hadn't he asked someone? What on earth was Lupin and the matron doing down at the Whomping Willow? Was it possible that James and the others were going down there too? If so what did the matron have to do with it? Was she in league with them? Maybe they had her under a spell...

Scrunching up his resolve and ignoring the stiffness of his legs Severus got up and headed to the door to the classroom intent on following them to find out exactly why they were going down to the Whomping willow with the matron but something on the desk stopped him. It was a piece of parchment, but not just any piece of parchment, it was a map of Hogwarts, but not just any map of Hogwarts either; it was an extraordinary map. 

He picked it up and studied it in the dim light of the full moon in the near window and even from that light he was sure there were at least a million different passage ways and corridors he had never seen before. But that was hardly the most extraordinary thing about this map, no by far the most extraordinary thing about it was the small labelled dots that were scattered around the map. And the ones labelled James, Sirius and Peter were slowly going towards the front door. 

This was amazing, this was a miracle; what was it doing in this classroom? Surely someone wouldn't just leave it lying around, something this valuable. But he didn't remember seeing it when he came in; then again he had been in a rush. But wouldn't one of the marauders have seen it? Then he noticed the labelling across the top.

_Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs_

That was enough to tell Severus everything. This map belonged to James and his little buddies and they had been using it to get around the school after hours. There was only one thing Severus could do now, follow them.

But why hadn't they noticed his little dot on the map? He wondered idly as he hurried out of the classroom into the moonlit corridors. If he wasn't much mistaken his dot was there as well as everyone else's. They could have sprung him right there in the classroom so why didn't they? In fact they didn't seem to notice at all. They didn't seem to notice, either, that they had left their map behind because they were almost at the door.

He raised his eyes from the map; there was no one out right now but he still had to keep his eyes open, for all he knew this map could be faulty and the last thing he wanted right now was to run into a teacher. Luckily enough he had no such trouble, in fact he got to the entrance hall in good time, a lot quicker than he had expected obviously, because waiting there for him was James, Sirius and Peter.

"Well, well, well look who it is. What a coincidence to run into you here Snapey, shouldn't you be in bed?" Sirius Black had a strange look on his face as he said that, as if he wished he could send Severus to sleep for eternity but also fighting the urge to laugh. 

"I believe you have something that belongs to us Snake." Little Peter piped up from between James and Sirius.

"If you'd just be so kind as to hand it over..." Sirius said pleasantly holding out his hand expectantly.

But Severus had no intention of handing the map back, this was a very valuable map and there was something in Blacks eyes that he didn't like. He spared a glance at James who seemed to be keeping uncharacteristically quiet. Shouldn't he be berating him about how slimy or nosey he was? He actually looked considerably paler in the dim moonlight. 

"Come on Snapey, be a good boy and give us back our map, we won't even hurt you if you do."

"What are you guys up to?" Severus said unsteadily clutching the map closer to him

"Not very smart are you Snape?" Sirius growled, "If you just give us the map we'll let you go, we won't even tell how you were out of bed late at night." 

"You were out of bed as well." Severus shot back his courage growing with every word, "What's to say I couldn't just turn this map in, I'm sure Filch would love it." He had hit a nerve because the next second Sirius had exploded like a faulty Filibuster firework.

"You slimy greasy little git, you just don't know when to keep your ugly face out of other peoples business do you?  I swear if you don't give me back that map now you'll be sorry you were ever born, in fact, your being born would have been a complete waste of your mother's time because you'd die by my hands." 

"Excuse me?" Severus said his temper slipping completely out of reach, "Excuse me? I think you should research these things a little more thoroughly before you start making threats. For your information..." But he couldn't finish as Sirius cut him off at that second.

"Fine! Fine, you know what I'll tell you, I'll tell you everything you want to know! Let me guess, you wanna know about Lupin don't you? You wanna know where he goes every month right? Don't deny it Snake; I know you've just been itching to find out, because you just can't mind your own business, can you?"

Actually Severus wasn't much interested in where Lupin went, he barely even noticed, but Sirius had intrigued him. Now that he had said that, he did notice that every month Lupin was gone for a week or so. Where did he go? Did it have something to do with the Matron?

"Yeah I knew you would be interested you slimy git, and tell you what, I'll tell you as long as you give me the map back."

"I'll only give it back after you tell me." Severus reasoned, he didn't want to fall for one of their traps, they'd probably just run away and he'd have lost a very powerful map.

He caught a glint of what looked like triumph in Sirius' eyes but as quick as it had come it was gone to be filled with a cunning humour.

"Very well," Sirius drawled crossing his arms across his chest and surveying Severus closely. James looked as if he wanted to say something but he kept his mouth shut, "I'm sure you've noticed Madam Pompfrey taking him down to the Whomping Willow, haven't you?" 

"Yes." Severus replied slowly and carefully 

"Well it's simple; all you have to do is prod the root with a long branch and the Willow wont whomp anymore. There's a passageway that goes down into Hogsmeade."

Severus' couldn't believe this, they were telling him all this just for some cruddy map? But he guessed if he had time to study the map carefully he would have figured out there was a passageway to Hogsmeade through the Whomping Willow. But what if they were lying? What if they were just having him on, they probably just wanted to see him get walloped by the Whomping Willow. He wasn't ready to believe some crackpot story about prodding the knot, not unless they did it first.

"You go first; you do it, I'm not falling for one of your stupid childish pranks."

"Very well..." Sirius agreed curtly that haunting glint of triumph sparkling even more noticeable in his eyes. James seemed to have lost all the colour in his face and if Severus had looked closer he would have noticed his hands were shaking. But Severus didn't notice any of this; an overwhelming feeling of triumph was washing over him and he noticed neither the stupid smirk on Peter Pettigrew's face nor the slightly green tinge that had stained James'.

"After you," Sirius motioned for the door with his hand, a sickly smirk plastered on his face. Severus found this slightly unnerving but nothing could dampen his triumph over the marauders. He glided past Sirius ignoring his suppressed giggle and easily opened the large oak doors that lead from the castle to the grounds. 

All four of them made their way towards the Willow in the darkness, only stopping once when Peter tripped over something. Once they made it to the Willow James lit up his wand and held it out to look for a branch, the light shaking along with his hand. Once he had located one he handed it to Sirius who dodged expertly between the willows thrashing limbs and prodded the root. All at once the Willows branches froze and the path to the passage was left open. 

Severus couldn't believe his eyes, it was so much better than he had thought; it actually worked. Sirius beckoned for them to come closer and he obliged walking side by side with James closer to the root. Sirius gave him a cynical smile and held his hand out, motioning for Severus to climb down the small hole that was visible under the root.

"After you," He simpered, his eyes glinting strangely in James' wand light.

Severus gave Sirius a sarcastic smile and brushed past him. The hole was only big enough to admit a fairly small person but he managed to squeeze through without much trouble. He waited for a minuet to see if the others would follow but he saw no sign of them. He drew his wand and prepared to set off into the darkness.

"Lumos," He whispered to his wand and a small light appeared at the end. He was just about to start walking when a hand appeared from the hole.

"The map Snake," He head Sirius' voice demand from somewhere above him, but now that he was here and safe he wasn't about to give them back that map. He could play just a dirty as they could.

"Go to hell," He yelled back setting off up the path. He could hear Sirius cursing but it was muffled and as he walked on it grew weaker and les audible. He allowed himself a satisfied smile as he walked deeper into the darkness. One to Severus, none to them. 

He had been walking for about a minuet when he realised that he had no idea how long this passageway was. For all he knew he could be walking all night and, though it was the holidays and everyone was gone there was always the marauders to dob him in if he didn't show up to breakfast in the morning. 

He quickened his pace in answer to his minds worries. True he could get in serious trouble for being here at this time of night but that didn't stop his curiosity from leading him forward. The tunnel indeed seemed long but that still didn't hinder his progress. In less time than he expected he reached his goal. It wasn't much but he knew this was where he wanted to be. 

He climbed up a small hole above him and held out his wand to examine the new landing. There was dust and broken furniture littering the floor of what looked like an old dilapidated house. The tasteless wallpaper was hanging miserably off the walls and the roof had cracks weaving all over it. It took less than a second for Severus to realise where he was, he was in the shrieking shack.

He stood and stared in wonder for a moment, not even the most experienced trouble makers had managed to get in here; he'd be famous. But then again it was Sirius that showed him so he obviously knew what was in here, why didn't he tell anyone? Maybe he wanted to keep all the glory for himself, he was probably sneaking girls in here to have sex, it sounded like something Sirius would do. Serverus scoffed ay Sirius' stupidity but the sound was drowned out by a low growl coming from the darkness in front of him. 

He held his wand gingerly out in front of him, his shaking hand causing the light to flicker and form weird shadows on the walls. He couldn't see what was there in front of him but he knew there was something there because the growls were getting louder and closer by the second. Whatever Severus had expected from this growling was so far from what he saw, instead of some stupid poltergeist of the like which haunted the castle, a huge fiery eyed wolf appeared in the dome of light emitting from his wand. 

Severus stepped back trying to put as much space between him and the beast while still trying to maintain eye contact. He knew if he looked away, even for a second, the beast would be on him and ripping him limb from limb. But the horrible down side to this was he couldn't see where he was going, so evidently, he tripped on a broken piece of furniture and fell squarely on his backside. 

That was all the beast needed to trigger it. In an instant it was on top of him, its putrid breath washing over his face and its feral eyes glinting in his wand light. He did the only thing he could think to do in a time like this, he screamed. There were words that could possibly explain the immense fear that was engulfing him. Everything made perfect sense now. The Matron, Lupin, the willow, the full moon, they were all the same thing. Lupin was a werewolf. Lupin was on top of him about to sink his teeth into his skin. He was about to be turned into a werewolf. 

It couldn't end like this; he had so much more to do. He had to finish school and become a great sorcerer and kill the man that made him. He had revenge to see through, he couldn't just die with so much unfinished business; it just wasn't fair. But then again, he could see her; he could finally tell her everything he had wanted to say. He could hear her voice and see her face and he could finally tell her how sorry he was.

But tonight wasn't his time to die. Just as Lupins teeth were about to puncture his skin there was a blast like a small bomb and the werewolf was thrown off him whimpering. Severus didn't catch much of what happened next as his mind was halfway through shock and disappointment. But he vaguely remembered a big black dog and a reindeer fighting with the wolf. Then quite suddenly, once the big black dog with the pale eyes had wrestled the werewolf Lupin into the next room, the giant reindeer turned into none other than James Potter. Severus was never quite sure; even when he looked back, if that had been a dream of if what he saw was reality. 

James dragged him from his position on the filthy floor onto his feet and pulled him through the hole in the floor into the dark tunnel.

"Wait," He protested vaguely, "My wand..."

"You can get it later, just hurry up!" James said frantically trying to pull Severus as far away from the hole as possible. 

The trip back through the tunnel was quick although James had dragged him, panting and cursing half the way. Once they got back to the hole at the base of the Willow James yelled for Peter to prod the root so they could climb up. He shot Severus a look that closely resembled concern but as brief as it had been his eyes had diverted and he was dragging him up through the hole. After James had pulled him up and away from the tree the feeling suddenly returned to Severus' limbs. He roughly pushed James away and stumbled towards a bush near the lake. He threw up. 

He couldn't believe what had just happened, Lupin was a werewolf, so that explained everything. But he had almost been bitten by a werewolf; he had almost been doomed to live a life worse than death. What would his mother think if he had been bitten and turned into a werewolf? What would happen to him? He'd surely be kicked out of school, they wouldn't want a werewolf. But they already had one. He had to tell Dumbledor.

"Where's Dumbledor?" Severus croaked stumbling, weak kneed, over to James.

"He's coming now; Peter's gone to get him..." James trailed of looking extremely uncomfortable, "Are you alright?"

"Am I alright? Am I alright!! Of course I'm not alright!" Severus exploded, how dare they do this, how dare he do this? First he plays this horrible prank on him then has the audacity to ask him if he's okay, "How dare you! You disgusting horrible... I could have been killed! Or worse, I could have been turned into a werewolf." He spat the last word so vehemently that James flinched slightly

"But you're okay," James reasoned giving Severus a ghost of his old smile

"No I'm not okay! I could have died! Didn't you hear me Potter I could have been turned into a werewolf! No I'm not okay!"

"What's going on here?" Luckily for James Dumbledor had appeared at that moment because Severus was ready to wring James' neck

"Professor there's a werewolf down there!" Severus blurted pointing a shaking finger towards the Whomping Willow.

"I know," Dumbledor said calmly turning to James, "Where's Lupin?" 

"He's still down there; Sirius is holding him off sir..." 

"Stupid boy!" Dumbledor practically yelled his eyes, his whole demeanour giving off an air of great and frightening power. 

"Sir, there's a werewolf and they... they tricked me!" Severus howled pointing his accusing finger at James and Peter. But Dumbledor didn't seem to care, nor did he seem to care that little Peter Pettigrew was hunched up on the grass sobbing. He merely strode over to the tree and picked up the stick Sirius had used to freeze the tree. He was going to go down there.

"Wait, Sir, Stop!" Severus yelled frantically running after the headmaster, "There's a werewolf down there!" 

"I know..." Dumbledor said curtly darting between the roots and crouching down next to the hole in the roots. He was going down; he didn't seem to understand the danger of going down there; there was a fully fledged werewolf just waiting to bite his head off. But just as Dumbledor was about to crawl into the hole Sirius' voice sounded from under the root.

"Peter! The root, quick!" Peters head shot up at the Sound of Sirius' voice and his sobs immediately stopped.

Dumbledor reached his hand down and a moment later Sirius had emerged from under the root of the Whomping Willow, his face ashen in the full moos light.

"You'll never believe..." He started, then, obviously realising who he was speaking to, shut his mouth and turned to James. 

"P-professor Dumbledor Sir..." Sirius started awkwardly his mouth flapping stupidly for a moment afterwards. 

"Come with me, all of you." Dumbledor said firmly

But Professor surely..." Severus started helplessly. He couldn't possibly be getting in trouble for this, the only bed thing he had done tonight was be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"We shall discuss it in my office Mr. Snape." Dumbledor said kindly, though his eyes were still blazing with that fire that had engulfed him entirely only minuets before.

He led the four of them silently up through the castle and to the familiar stone goblin that blocked the entrance to his office. 

"Chocolate frogs," 

None of them could seem to find their voices, Peter was sobbing into his robes, James was absently patting Peter on the back and Sirius was inspecting a large gash on his arm. They didn't even seem to care, they didn't care that they had almost killed him or that they were surely going to get expelled, or at least suspended. The five of them entered the office and Dumbledor strode over behind his desk and sat down. 

"Please explain what happened." He said softly, though he seemed to be talking more to Sirius than anyone else. 

"Well you see sir Snape here was nosing around..." Sirius started in an offhand sort of way

"I was not nosing around!" Severus cut in only just resisting the urge to stamp on Sirius' foot.

"You were too, stealing other peoples' possessions..." 

"Please boys," Dumbledor interrupted them, "Peter, can you tell me exactly what happened?"

Peter Pettigrew gasped at the proposition but immediately launched into the story of how they had spotted Severus going into an empty class room then how they led him down to the willow and told him it would lead him to Hogsmeade but it was really Lupin. Missing out, of course; the map, the animals and his involvement in it at all.

"Thank you Mr. Pettigrew, now Mr. Snape, would you please give me your version of how things went?" Dumbledor started at him expectantly and he would have spilled everything, the map and the strange animals he had seen. But weather he was scared James and Sirius would kill him or because of that special magical bond that had been created when they had saved him, he didn't say anything of the sort.

"It is as he says." He muttered staring down at his clenched fists

"Well boys, I didn't think you were capably of something like this. You do know this could lead to suspension, possibly expulsion from the school."

"But Sir!" Severus yelled losing his head completely, "I had nothing to do with this! The worst you could do to me is give me detention for being out of bed after hours! It was all his fault!" He pointed at Sirius who rolled his eyes and looked away

"We are not here to blame people Severus; you were all out of bounds when you shouldn't have been," 

"What!" Severus started again, outraged, "I could have been killed! Do you realise what they did? They lead me into a trap! They wanted me dead!"

"Well who wouldn't?" Sirius started up turning to Severus, his face red with anger, "Snooping around at ungodly hours of the night, it was your own fault you stupid git!" 

"Boys!" Dumbledor yelled over their bickering, "Boys I am not the one who issues punishment," 

It took Severus a moment to figure out what exactly Dumbledor was talking about but minuets after Dumbledor had said that the house heads for Slytherin, Gryffindor and Hufflepuff appeared in the room, then all because clear.

"What's going on here?" Professor McGonagall said huffily looking around the room. When her eyes landed on James and Sirius her nostrils went white and her mouth thinned into a very thin line. She wasn't the only one who looked furious, Professor Dias, the Slytherin head was looking at Severus with loathing in her eyes. She had obviously been woken up because her long black hair was messed up and her face was unusually white. The Hufflepuff head just looked at the sobbing form of Peter with a mixture of disappointment and concern.

"I take it you can take care of this lot?" Dumbledor said politely 

"Oh yes, well take care of them." Professor Dias said in a hauntingly calm voice, her eyes glinting maliciously. Severus gulped heavily as she lead him off towards her office, all the while ways in which to kill Sirius and James running through Severus' head.  


End file.
